Sad but thankful

Today started off on a very sad note as Matt shared with me that a fellow solider, who he has been serving alongside with in Afghanistan, made the ultimate sacrifice for our country on Saturday (along with many others). Matt attended his first (and hopefully last) memorial service in Afghanistan today and paid his respects to 4 of America's finest heroes. After we talked, I cried for those families and prayed for peace, healing and comfort for them that only the Father can provide. About two and half seconds after that, I started feeling sorry for myself of all things. I'm not proud of that, but hey, I'm keeping it real. I actually started to think, "Oh, poor pitiful me. An Army wife. My husband could come under hostile fire and not return from his deployment." Here's the thing, though. And it's a biggie!



IT'S NOT ABOUT ME! My life is not my own. It was bought at a price. Thank you Jesus! If this life was all about me and my comfort and my happiness, believe me, I'd make a few changes. But it isn't. Hallelujah! I've done that whole "living for myself" thing (and still frequently fall back into that pattern) and it's actually pretty empty. Most sin is pretty disatisfying once the novelty wears off!


I was put on this earth to glorify God and to enjoy Him. I can't do that well if I'm throwing myself a pity party. That certainly doesn't bring God any glory what.so.ever.


So, instead, I choose to be thankful today. I'm thankful first and foremost for the unparalleled grace and mercy of my beautiful savior. I'm also thankful for my wonderful husband: that he is alive and well, that he is willling to serve, that he is a brother in Christ, and for being my partner in this life. I'm thankful for Natalie, for Colton, for Adelyn, and for Easton. I'm thankful for Easton's foster parents who are selflessly lavishing love on him each day knowing that someday they will have to say goodbye. I'm thankful for my family, my friends, my freedom, my health, and every single day God gives me to live for Him.

My heart is heavy as I reflect on the numerous soldiers who have died in Iraq and Afghanistan in recent years. I'm so sad for those families. I'm angry at the state our world is in. It's pretty ugly. I long for eternity. And I choose to be thankful in all of it.